Total Nut Job
by Monroe-Militia
Summary: When Bass and Miles find Connor in the Tower, surrounded by squirrels that he's named and trained, they think that he's gone a bit nutty. Set after season 2. (Eventual Charlett)
1. Chapter 1

They'd been tracking Connor for much longer than any of them had intended. Bass had been getting increasingly short-fused and his anger was almost always directed at Charlie, since she was 'supposed to be the damn tracker'. The more he complained, the angrier Charlie got and the less inclined she was to continue helping him. Especially when he acted as if it was all her fault that the trail they'd been following for weeks disappeared often and left them with little to no clues until they managed to find someone who had seen Connor and discover a new trail, rather than his own fault for being the one who had driven his son away in the first place.

Tensions had risen so high between the pair that, when they lost the trail for what felt like the hundredth time within a couple of weeks, they opted to go off in separate directions to look for any hints of where Connor might have gone. Bass was still fuming and cursing under his breath, so Miles gave Charlie a quick look that warned her not to do anything stupid or get herself lost before heading off with Bass to make sure that he hopefully wouldn't do anything too moronic himself.

The pair moved in silence, spotting nothing even remotely helpful, as they walked past what seemed to be an infinite number of practically identical trees before they finally came to a stop. They were debating turning back to meet Charlie when they heard the sound of water splashing coming from not too far away.

The two men exchanged a glance and each moved to grip their weapons as they followed the source of the noise.

"It's just a squirrel," Bass mumbled irritably as he spotted the creature that was walking along the edge of the body of water.

The squirrel turned at the sound of the voice and stared between the two men with nervous, beady eyes before skittering away, off down the beach.

As they watched it go, the pair realized that they recognized the beach further down. It still looked almost exactly the same as it had last time they'd been there.

"Tower doors are probably still blown open," Miles commented as he watched Bass staring after the disappearing squirrel like he thought it somehow possessed the answers to where his missing son had gone. "Big abandoned building seems like it might be your kid's speed."

Miles figured Connor was definitely the type that would consider the Tower to be a castle free for the taking if he happened to stumble upon it. And according to Charlie's best guess, he'd been in the area, so it seemed like as reasonable of a bet as any.

* * *

Meanwhile, within the Tower walls, Connor had gotten himself into the middle of a very heated fight between his co-habitants.

"Hey, Asshole, leave him alone," he complained as he threw a piece of food at an especially big squirrel. "No killing the little squirrels. There's enough food to go around without stealing his."

The big squirrel turned it's focused from what appeared to be the runt of the squirrel species in order to bare it's teeth and glare at Connor in a way that assured him that the moment would not be forgotten.

At first, the squirrels that had infested Connor's latest home had bothered him, but he was the one invading their home so he'd let them stay. Somewhere along the way, he'd developed a sort of understanding with them and now he found himself enjoying the company. He had bonded with the squirrels and developed a sort of family with them, as strange as it seemed. They had taken him in and were loyal, for the most part. He'd even managed to train most of them pretty well and had grown to be able to tell them apart. He'd even started to name them and was convinced that most of them had learned their new names and recognized them.

Asshole was the exception though. He didn't listen to Connor and had never been welcoming. He didn't get along with the man or the other squirrels and Connor had learned not to get too close to him, since he had a strong history of biting and scratching when he got upset. Which was always.

When Asshole finished off his own food and decided that it still wasn't enough, he targeted the little one once again, clearly not looking for a fair fight.

Connor sighed as Asshole swatted the piece of food out of the other animal's hand before calling over to the shaking little squirrel, "Come here, Tiny."

The puny creature made a beeline around the content looking bigger one and over to Connor. It stopped next to him and sniffed the air hesitantly.

Connor stretched his hand out closer, letting Tiny investigate the food. The squirrel continued to stare at the piece of food nervously, as though it thought it might be a trap, for a few seconds longer before it decided that its hunger trumped its fear and took a step forward.

* * *

"It's like a freaking zoo just for squirrels in here," Bass muttered as he walked further into the Tower and shoved a squirrel away with his foot, causing it to make an annoyed squeaking sound at him before running off further into the building. A couple other squirrels chose to follow that one's lead, while a few others just eyed the pair nervously.

Miles was just about to agree with him, when he thought he heard a faint voice.

"Well, someone's here," he commented. "...Unless the squirrels have evolved and taught themselves how to talk, in which case we're probably all fucked."

Bass was clearly not in the mood for his friend's joke as he followed the voice down the hallway, without acknowledging that Miles had even spoken. When he turned the corner, Bass stopped so abruptly that Miles practically ran into his back. Miles grumbled something under his breath and pushed his way into the room before pausing and staring with his friend in a totally silent shock.

Connor had looked up at the sound of footsteps, but still remained crouched on the ground, virtually surrounded by squirrels at various stages of eating as Tiny nibbled timidly at the food in his hand.

The silence dragged out for what felt like an eternity until finally Miles decided that he had to break it, whether he had any idea of what to say in that moment or not. As he turned his head to look at Bass, with a smug smirk on his lips as if he had just received the Christmas present of all joke material, Bass just glared over at him.

"Not a word." He warned.

Miles' grin only widened. He didn't need to make a joke. He just needed Bass to acknowledge just how joke-worthy the moment was and he'd already accomplished that. So, instead, he just shrugged and commented, "Well, we found him."

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review!**


	2. Chapter 2

Charlie's patience was already stretched incredibly thin and she was beginning to wonder whether she should be going to make sure that those two idiots were alright when she heard a rustling sound coming from the leaves behind her. She turned quickly and her hand instinctively moved towards her weapon as a precautionary measure, but she immediately let go of her grip on it when she saw her uncle step through the trees.

"Where's Monroe?" She questioned. "Did he start complaining again, enough that you finally decided to stop helping him?"

"We found Connor," Miles responded. "Bass is talking to him, but apparently my input was not welcome."

"What did you say?" Charlie questioned.

Her uncle shot her an indignant look, but quickly gave up on his innocent act as she arched a brow at him. A small smirk formed on his lips as he admitted, "I made a couple of squirrel jokes and then Bass kicked me out."

"Squirrel jokes?" Charlie asked in a tone of sheer confusion.

"Yeah. Kid lost his mind," Miles responded. "Turns out they call it going nuts because if you go crazy enough, you actually become a magnet for squirrels."

Charlie looked doubtful, but said nothing for several long seconds. Finally, she questioned, "How long are we going to wait for them to come back before we give up? I mean, do you really think he even stands a chance of talking Connor into coming back with him?"

"Bass is trying to convince the squirrel king to come back as we speak," her uncle told her. "But I don't know. It'll probably take a lot to convince the kid to leave his sad excuse for a Bennett Republic – population all the squirrels that decided to make themselves at home in the Tower. Bass is probably going to start promising him a real republic again and then we've got a problem."

* * *

"Just give me another chance," Bass begged. The sound of his own pleading voice grated on his nerves, but he was desperate to get his son back. The knowledge that Connor seemed convinced that he would rather live a life of complete isolation and spend his time with a bunch of rats with bushy tails than be around him had only made Bass's resolve harden even further.

"We both know that you're never going to get the republic back. It's not what your precious Miles wants," Connor retorted bitterly. "So I think I'll stick with the squirrels, thanks." He shot his father a blatantly forced smile as his eyes displayed the full extent of his resentment.

"So you're just going to stay here by yourself, surrounded by squirrels?" Bass asked incredulously.

"It beats being homeless," Connor responded. His dad hadn't even known he'd existed when he'd been homeless. He knew that it was an extra low blow, but he couldn't care less in that moment.

"You'd really rather sit here all day, alone, than come back with me?" His father questioned with an edge to his tone.

Connor shrugged at him dismissively.

"You do realize I'm not leaving until you agree to come with me, right?" Bass demanded. "I didn't spend weeks trying to find you just to turn around and leave."

"Because it worked out so well for me when you wouldn't leave me alone in Mexico," his son retorted.

"What do you have here to lose?" Bass questioned as he gestured with his arms across the room that was almost completely empty, save for some squirrels that were loitering along the floor. "You're not risking anything by coming back. Give it a try. If you really hate it, then you can leave. As long as you give it a reasonable chance first, then I won't even stop you." Connor still didn't look overly convinced, so in an act of desperation, his father added, "Hell, you can even bring your squirrels if you want to."

Connor considered for a moment before, to Bass's surprise, he rose to his feet. He shot his father an accusing glare then as he warned, "Fine. But screw up again and I'm done for good."

* * *

Charlie heard another rustling, louder than the noise that Miles had made one his way back, before she noticed a squirrel leap from the branch of a nearby tree onto another branch that belonged to the tree one closer to her. Seconds later, the same thing happened on the other side of her. Before long there were squirrels on all sides of her. She was about to turn and shoot her uncle a questioning look when a couple of much more human forms stepped through the trees.

"That's nice," Miles commented dryly. "We'll be able to travel real subtly with a dozen squirrels following us around and making all that noise."

"Right. Because people hear squirrels in a tree and think 'there must be someone else around here'," Connor retorted.

"He's not seriously bringing the squirrels with him," Miles insisted as he looked over at Bass and pleaded with his eyes for him to take the logical side of things.

Bass shot him a helpless look in response as he shrugged and asked, "Is it really that big of a deal?"

"Yes." Miles responded emphatically as he nervously eyed one of the squirrels that was skittering around, a little too close for his comfort. He'd already been scratched by one on his way out of the Tower and he was not looking forward to a repeat event.

"I thought you were kidding about the squirrel thing," Charlie told her uncle as she turned to look over at him.

Miles didn't answer her, since he was a little pre-occupied at the moment with the squirrel that was inching ever close to him. He glared down at that squirrel in warning and decided that if it came any closer, then he was going to have to kick it and show it who was boss. Just as he was about to do so, another ran by and climbed halfway up his leg before biting down hard. Before Miles had the chance to retaliate, the squirrel had already rushed away to hide in a tree behind Connor, who did not seem at all offended by the squirrels' actions. In fact, he looked pleased as a wide smirk formed on his lips.

"That one bites," he warned in an innocent voice that was quite purposely intended to piss the other man off more.

"We're not bringing squirrels with us, Bass. This isn't the damn Jungle Book," Miles complained. "...Actually, I'd rather it be the Jungle Book. At least then we'd have a bear on our side instead of a bunch of useless squirrels."

"If the kid wants to keep the squirrels as pets, then let him have his damn squirrels," Bass argued.

Under other circumstances, Connor might have complained about being called a kid, but at the moment he was enjoying Miles' losing an argument with his father too much to interject. For once, his father seemed to be actually taking his side on things and he was going to enjoy it for the very limited amount of time that he was sure it would last for.

"They're not hurting anyone," Bass added on when the other man continued to glare at him in silence.

"Except for me," Miles pointed out. He was clearly still annoyed from being bit by the animal that he could only hope wasn't carrying any kind of diseases.

"So you're telling me you can't handle having a couple of squirrels around because you're afraid of them?" Bass challenged. He knew full-well that a couple was an understatement, but he also knew that Miles did not like to be patronized and figured that might work out in his favour for the moment.

Miles glared over at him before growling out, "I'm getting really sick of your pretending to be a good parent shit."

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review! A giant thanks goes out to decadenceofmysoul, RevolutionReader, and KimberlyHavey for being awesome and reviewing the first chapter! :D**


	3. Chapter 3

"He's playing fetch with a squirrel," Miles hissed out. How did no one else see just how insane Connor had gone? Clearly Monroe insanity was genetic and Connor had more than inherited it from his father. "Don't try to pretend that you can't see that."

"Shut up," Bass grumbled back at him.

"I can't just sit here and pretend that this is normal," Miles insisted as he watched the squirrel rush back over for the tenth time in the last couple of minutes to return a shiny piece of metal to Connor's outstretched hand.

"I think it's kind of cute," Charlie commented, causing her uncle to turn and glare at her over at her. "What? I'd rather him be the crazy guy that talks to squirrels than turn into a paranoid dictator like his dad did."

Bass grunted out some incoherent retort as he watched his son throw the piece of metal once again. Apparently he'd had enough, since he turned away and headed off to go get some water, mostly just for the sake of getting away from Miles' constant complaints for a few minutes.

* * *

When Bass noticed Charlie standing by herself eating later, he decided to walk over to talk to her.

"I've got a favour I need you to do for me," he told her.

"You mean other than the one I just finished where I spent weeks on end helping you track down your son?" She retorted. "Sure. I'd love to help you out after just how grateful you were for that."

"Look, I'm serious. I barely managed to convince him to come back and he's threatening to run off the second that something doesn't go his way," he insisted.

"And what do you expect me to do about it?" She asked as she arched a brow at him.

"Give him something to stay for," he responded.

Charlie let out a laugh at that. "You're kidding me, right?"

He simply shrugged in response and she realized with a sudden horror that he was in fact not joking.

"You're serious?" She asked him in disbelief. It was a surprise, even coming from him. "You want me to sleep with your son so that he won't run away from you again?"

"It's not like it would be the first time you had sex with him," Bass countered.

"That's disgusting, even for you," she insisted before spinning on her heel and walking away.

"Charlie!" He tried calling after her, but she just ignored him. He could only hope that she wouldn't tell Connor about his request and mess things up right away for them.

* * *

She stormed off with her food, over to where Connor was feeding a couple of squirrels some of his own food out of his hand, and sat down next to him. She could feel Bass eying her and felt an overwhelming urge to tell Connor what had just happened, but decided against it for the time being. She hadn't spent that long helping search for him to have him run off again right away.

"So, did you always want pet squirrels?" She asked in an amused tone after several long seconds of silence.

"No." He responded as he watched a couple of his squirrels chasing each other up a nearby tree. "Originally I wanted a monkey."

"A monkey?" She repeated. "What, normal pets just don't do it for you?"

"I watched Aladdin a lot when I was little," he offered up as an explanation. "And then I ended up having my life pretty much turn into that, but without the monkey and the happy ending." His gaze finally focused over onto her as he asked, "What about you? You have any pets before the blackout?"

"No, but I remember begging my mom to get a dog," she responded.

"When I was six, my mom got me sea-monkeys," he told her. "I couldn't have a real monkey, so I guess she figured it was the next best thing. Probably the only kind of pet she could really afford anyways. I was thrilled for a week. Right up until I realized how boring they were and started complaining for something better."

They sat in silence again for a moment, picking at their food, before an especially large squirrel began to inch its way closer.

"You don't need more food," Connor insisted as he tossed a stick over at it, hoping to scare it off. "I'm serious."

"Why don't you feed that one?" Charlie questioned.

"Look at him, he's huge. He already steals enough food from the other ones without getting anymore," he responded. "Besides, he doesn't listen. There's a reason I named him Asshole."

"No wonder he doesn't listen with a name like that and you throwing things at him," Charlie defended. She turned her attention to the squirrel and held out some of her own food in offering as she insisted, "You're just misunderstood, aren't you?"

"I wouldn't feed him like that if I were you," Connor advised. "He bites a lot."

The squirrel skittered over and began to eat out of Charlie's hand and she smiled over at Connor triumphantly as she commented, "See? He doesn't bite if you're nice to him."

"Believe me, I was plenty nice to him," he retorted. "He's just acting nice to you now to spite me."

"Oh come on, not you too," Miles grumbled out as he walked over to find his niece feeding a squirrel out of her hand. "We should be eating the squirrels, not feeding them." Connor glared over at him for that and Charlie shook her head in disapproval. "If you had to choose one, did you really have to pick the asshole squirrel that keeps biting me?"

Connor shot her a victorious look at that since, for once, he agreed with Miles.

"Stop calling him Asshole," she insisted. "He needs a new name." A beaming smile slowly crept its way onto her lips and she looked up at her uncle as she told him, "I'm going to name him Squirrel Miles because he likes to pretend that he doesn't like anyone, but he acts like less of a grump around me. Just like you."

"Right. Because that won't be confusing at all," Miles responded dryly.

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review! The rest of the chapters of this are written now, so there should be daily updates until it's done. Also, a huge thanks goes out to RyansDreamMaker for reviewing last chapter! :D**


	4. Chapter 4

They were riding in the wagon when finally Bass couldn't stand it anymore and demanded, "Can you tell Rocky over there to stop staring at me?"

Connor frowned as he looked over at the squirrel in question. He shot his father a look of confusion as he insisted, "His name isn't Rocky."

Bass's Rocky and Bullwinkle reference was clearly lost on his son, so he just let out a sigh before commenting, "Well Squirrelly Joe, or whatever his name is, won't keep his beady little eyes off of me."

"Twitchy," Connor said, which seemed to capture the squirrel's attention as its head turned to look over at him. "Ven aca."

With that, the squirrel skittered away from Bass and over to Connor who smirked down at it proudly.

"Your squirrels speak Spanish?" Miles asked from up front as he turned to look over his shoulder. "In that case, what's Spanish for 'bite me again and I'll shoot you'?"

"Vete al infierno," Connor responded pointedly.

"That wasn't the translation I was looking for, was it?" Miles questioned.

"No," Connor agreed happily.

"So then what was it?"

"Go to hell," Connor translated as a smirk grew on his lips.

"Don't worry, I'm already there," Miles responded dramatically.

"This is why the squirrels don't like you," Charlie, who was seated beside her uncle with a strikingly plump squirrel in her lap, insisted.

"I liked you better when you agreed that he's crazy," Miles retorted.

"I've never had a pet before, okay?" Charlie defended herself.

"Squirrels aren't pets," he argued.

"Don't listen to him, Miles," Charlie cooed as she scratched her uncle's squirrel counterpart behind the ears. "He doesn't know what he's talking about."

* * *

As Connor shot her one of his flirty little smiles, Charlie could feel Monroe's eyes on her, watching her every movement for her reaction. She felt like there was something crawling on her and just wanted to smack it away, but instead she simply turned her head away and ignored both the father and the son as she pretended to suddenly become very interested in her uncle's fight with her squirrel.

"Leave him alone, Miles," she told him.

"Thank you," Miles insisted huffily as he kicked at the squirrel.

"I meant you," Charlie corrected him. "Look at how little he is, it's not a fair fight."

"That's literally the fattest squirrel that I have ever seen, Charlie," her uncle argued.

"You're still a giant compared to him, just let him be," she insisted.

"_I_ should leave _him_ alone?" Miles asked incredulously. "He's the one that keeps running up and attacking me... Especially since he imprinted on you like a baby duck and decided to attack anyone who even looks at you."

"Well maybe if you stopped kicking him, then he'd stop biting you," she pointed out in an exasperated tone.

She chanced a glance in Connor's direction to find that he was staring over at her once again.

Charlie was anything but happy with the favour that Bass had not even asked fo, but insisted onr. There was no way that she was going to have sex with Connor just because he told her to and she hated that he had taken that option away from her. If she slept with Connor, then it would be like she was doing it for Monroe, which was an idea that she couldn't stand. But if she refused just because of Monroe's suggestion, then she was still letting him have control over her actions, even if it wasn't the control that he had been seeking out.

It had been a while and Charlie admittedly had needs that she would like to be met and Connor was a prime candidate for that. Hell, she'd even grown to miss him after he had run off, as much as having him around was a pain in the ass at times. She hadn't helped track him down so that Bass could have his son back and potentially decide to go after the second coming of the Monroe Republic once again. No, she had spent weeks tracking Connor down because she had wanted him around. She had wanted him, but now Monroe was undermining those feelings and she hated it. Finally she decided that she would just ignore him and do what she wanted.

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review! Another huge thanks goes out to KimberlyHavey for reviewing last chapter! :D**


	5. Chapter 5

Charlie was sitting on top of Connor, half undressed, when she suddenly froze and crossed her arms over her chest as she stared at something behind him.

Connor pushed his upper body up, with his weight on his elbows, as he turned to see what she was looking at. He was half expecting his father to have caught them again, but instead he found only a particularly plump squirrel staring over at them with beady little accusing eyes.

"Ignore him," Connor insisted. He moved as if to bring his lips to her neck, but she shifted away from his touch before his mouth could reach her, so he stopped and frowned.

"I can't do this with the squirrel equivalent of my uncle staring at us," she told him and shot him an apologetic look before focusing her attention back on the squirrel that had not budged.

Connor looked back over his shoulder before pointing out, "That squirrel is not looking at you in an uncle kind of way. He looks like he wants to scratch my eyes out and make a squirrel family of his own with you."

He turned his attention back to her with a smirk on his lips, only to find her glaring at him. She stared him down for a second before asking, "Can we not talk about fake Miles wanting to use me as a mate?"

"Well we could talk about real Miles wanting to use you as a mate, but something tells me that would be even more of a mood-killer," he responded in an amused tone.

"You're disgusting," she insisted. "My uncle does not want to have sex with me."

"No, but that squirrel does," Connor responded as his hand searched the ground for something to chuck in its direction. He found a pretty sizable rock and held it up proudly as he told her, "I'll get rid of him."

"You're not throwing that at him," Charlie said firmly.

"Relax. I'll just throw it near him and scare him off," he responded.

"Fine, but don't hit him," she gave in a little reluctantly.

Connor turned and hurled the rock at a tree behind the squirrel. It hit with a loud sound and sent the squirrel skittering off into the nearby trees.

"There... Now where were we?"

* * *

Miles groaned as his least favourite of the many hated squirrels came running out of the nearby trees and stopped suspiciously close to him. The squirrel stared over at him as if was waiting for his guard to go down so that it could strike.

"Why don't you go bother, Charlie?" Miles demanded. He was in no way proud of himself for talking to a squirrel.

Bass caught him doing so and a smirk formed on his lips, but he chose not to make any comment about Miles' talking to the squirrels. Instead, in what he thought was a helpful tone, he pointed out, "At least you're the squirrel that all the other squirrels are afraid of."

"I am not a squirrel, Bass," Miles grunted out unhappily.

* * *

Charlie turned her head to look over at Connor, who still hadn't fully caught his breath yet, and hesitantly told him, "Your dad asked me to sleep with you to keep you from running off again... Or not really asked, more like ordered."

Connor's forehead crinkled in confusion as he questioned, "You slept with me because my dad told you to?" He wasn't sure what bothered him more, that his father seemed to think that he couldn't get Charlie on his own or that she had gone along with his plan.

"No," she responded as she rolled onto her side to fully face him. "I almost didn't have sex with you _because_ he told me to. I just thought that you should know." He did not look impressed so, much to her own surprise, she added, "His method was disgusting, but I get it. In his own insane way he just wants to keep you around. And I wouldn't mind having you stay either."

* * *

A smug smirk formed on Bass's lips when Charlie and Connor reemerged from wherever they had disappeared off to together, each looking quite a bit disheveled and with a suspicious amount of grass stuck to the back of their shirts. Charlie shoved past him with her shoulder on her way by as she grunted out, "I didn't do it for you."

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review!**


	6. Chapter 6

"Miles, come here!" Charlie called out.

Miles shook his head in exasperation. He'd fallen for that enough times over the last couple of days, when she had really been calling her precious squirrel, that he knew better than to go over there.

"I'm not falling for that again, Charlie!" He told her angrily. "Out of all the possible names you could have given it, was it really necessary to name your damn squirrel after me?"

"Most people would be flattered," she pointed out innocently. "And I was actually calling you this time."

He let out an exaggerated sigh and then, in a particularly grumpy tone, asked, "What do you want then?"

An amused grin fought its way onto her lips as she told him, "I was just going to ask if you've seen Squirrel Miles yet today."

Miles just shook his head and walked away, grumbling incoherently, as she began to laugh unsympathetically.

* * *

When they stopped again for the night, Connor was playing fetch again with the same squirrel as before, which seemed strangely content to chase after a piece of metal and bring it back to Connor endlessly. Another squirrel decided that it wanted the metal for itself though and rushed over to fight the first squirrel for it.

"Walnut, detente," Connor called out in an exasperated tone.

A smirk formed on Miles' lips and his gaze instantly flickered over to Bass to see if the other man had heard what he had. He found Bass already staring back at him with a huge grin on his lips as he tried to hold back a laugh.

Miles turned his attention back to his friends' son as he faked an interest and questioned, "What was that squirrel's name?"

Connor turned and saw the pair smirking over at him like a pair of five year old and frowned before suspiciously responding, "Walnut. Why?"

His question remained unanswered as the other two men erupted into a fit of laughter. Connor looked over at Charlie and arched a brow at her, but she just shook her head in response. She had no idea what they thought was so funny.

* * *

Miles, who hadn't been able to get back to Willoughby fast enough to get some space from the squirrels, was suddenly in a suspiciously better mood as they got close to the town. He still didn't get along with Squirrel Miles in the slightest, and was often scolded by Charlie for his endless death threats at the so-called "defenseless" creature, but he took a strange liking to the squirrel named Walnut. He still kept his distance from it, but it was the one squirrel that he would talk about without making empty threats or grumbling to himself under his breath like a cranky old man.

In fact, he brought the squirrel up strangely often, as he asked questions about it that Connor couldn't understand what the man's possible motivation could be for asking. He was sure it had something to do with why Miles and his father began giggling or grinning like idiots whenever the squirrel was mentioned, but no matter how many times he and Charlie asked what could possibly be so funny, the pair would simply brush their questions off and pretend that they hadn't heard.

* * *

When they got back to Willoughby, their relief was short-lived, since Gene instantly greeted them with news that meant that they were not going to be able to rest like they had been counting on doing. Rachel had been captured by a couple of left-over Patriots that had arrived in their absence and the keys to the cell never left the side of their highly protected leader.

* * *

**A/N: Please read and review! :)**


	7. Chapter 7

"How the hell are we supposed to get close enough to get the keys without them knowing that something's up?" Miles muttered out as they stared over at a large group of Patriots and the keys that were hanging from the belt of the one standing at its center. While the others were trying to think of a plan, Connor just smirked to himself and walked over to one of his squirrels. Miles glared over at Bass as he questioned, "Could you maybe get your son to be even a little bit helpful instead of just playing with his damn squirrels?"

Bass looked at him with a helpless shrug before turning to look over at where his son was kneeling down next to the same squirrel that seemed to enjoy playing fetch oh so much.

Connor held up the piece of metal that the squirrel was such a fan of and then walked over to look around the corner of the building to peer across at where the group of Patriots were standing. He pretended to throw the metal and muttered out, "Ir conseguirlo." The squirrel went skittering off frantically and Connor turned around, holding up the piece of metal that was still in his hand triumphantly, before insisting, "We should probably get out of here."

As they moved away, they heard a faint arguing over coming from behind them.

* * *

A few minutes later, Miles stood in disbelief as the squirrel that he had thought was particularly unintelligent, even for a squirrel, sprang up Gene's front yard with a ring of keys in its hands.

"Still think they're useless?" Connor challenged in an amused tone as he grabbed the keys out of his squirrel's paws. Connor had discovered that the squirrel was particularly fond of shiny objects within days of arriving at the Tower, something that had provided him with quite a bit of entertainment during his first few days there. The squirrel's obsession with shiny metal had proved to come in handy and he was quite proud of himself and his squirrels. There was no way that he was going to let Miles live down the fact that one of his squirrels had been the key to rescuing his girlfriend any time in the near future.

Charlie smirked over at her uncle before turning her attention to her grandfather and asking, "So where is this cell they've got her locked in?"

* * *

The actual cell itself was only guarded by a couple of men, since the leftover Patriots hadn't been expecting anyone to get to the keys. They knew that they only had a limited amount of time, but two Patriots were no match for the four of them. They managed to take out the Patriots and get Rachel out of her cell before anyone else even showed up.

Once back at Gene's place, Miles commented, "I guess we didn't finish cleaning them up after all. They just keep coming back like cockroaches."

"It isn't going to take long for them to figure out who got her out," Charlie pointed out. "Which means that we're going to need a new safe-house."

* * *

Miles groaned as he looked around the safe-house that was already questionably sized for the six humans that were living in it together and was beyond over-crowded with the herd of squirrels that had taken over it. Gene and Rachel were sitting inside, seeming to have adjusted to the squirrels surprisingly quickly, although that might have had something to do with their role in rescuing Rachel.

Miles, on the other hand, couldn't take one more second of it, so he decided to go outside again. Charlie and Connor had disappeared together for a change, unfortunately leaving all of their squirrels behind, so he headed to go sit outside with Bass.

Squirrel Miles seemed to be in a particularly bad mood when Charlie reemerged from the trees with Connor, fooling no one about what they had just been up to. He had been gathering a small pile of nuts before, but as soon as the pair came into sight he glared over at Connor. Walnut took the opportunity to try to rob him of his findings and Squirrel Miles took that as reason to unleash his anger on the smaller squirrel as he grabbed the nut back out of its hands and began to mercilessly beat the other squirrel with it.

A wide grin formed on Bass's lips. He turned to face his friend as he proudly commented, "Hey, Miles. Stop playing with your nuts."

Miles turned and glared at him, clearly beyond unamused with the other man's sense of humour, as his niece rolled her eyes. Connor, on the other hand, let out a small snicker which only caused his father's smile to grow in size.

_The End_

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**A/N: Please read and review! :)**


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